14 Books To Improve Your Social Skills

Are you looking for books to be more communicative? We propose 10 essential titles.

Human beings are social beings and in fact interpersonal relationships are an important factor for our  emotional well-being. 

The deficit of social skills negatively affects our mental health and that is why it is necessary to acquire a series of skills that help us live in harmony with others and, consequently, with ourselves.

What are social abilities

Social skills are a series of skills and behaviors that we use when interacting with others, and allow that relationship to be mutually satisfactory and effective. But what are the most important social skills?

  • Active listening
  • Assertiveness
  • Emotional validation
  • Empathy
  • Bargaining power
  • Respect
  • Credibility
  • Positive thinking
  • Emotional regulation
  • Patience
  • You can delve into these and more social skills in our post: ” The 14 main social skills to be successful in life “

Social skills books

Being skills, it is possible to acquire and learn them. Many books deal with this topic and provide knowledge about which are the most important social skills and how to use them. 

Aware of the benefit that their domain brings, in this article we have prepared a list of books that do just that, help you improve social skills.

1. Interpersonal intelligence (M. Silberman and F. Hansburg)

There is a lot of talk about emotional intelligence, a concept that derives from Howard Gardner’s conception of multiple intelligences. Now, a no less important concept is that of interpersonal intelligence, which also derives from the latter, that is, from Gardner’s theory.

Interpersonal intelligence is the ability to relate to others, to control our emotions. Also, doing it empathically and assertively. One of the books that delves into this subject is that of Silberman and Hansburg. A work full of practical resources, which help to improve self-awareness and skills in relationships with other individuals. It is a great text that uses direct language and includes self-assessments to see if you have learned with the content of the reading.

  • You can buy it  here.

2. Ideas that stick (Chip Heath and Dan Heath)

Although sometimes we think that we are communicating with others in the correct way, our message may not reach the other interlocutor in the way we think. 

Communicating properly is an art, and there are people who do it really well. This text allows to know, through  social psychology, 6 important points on how to communicate ideas efficiently. This will help you get the most out of your conversations.

3. Speak fluently (Alan Garner)

This is another one of those essential books on interpersonal communication, because it helps you to know and efficiently use the best techniques to start and maintain an interesting, stimulating and productive conversation. 

In addition, it allows you to know how to deal with criticism and how to handle manipulation in a gentle and elegant way. You can not lose this.

4. Emotional intelligence (Daniel Goleman)

Social and interpersonal skills are an important part of emotional intelligence. Now, to be able to relate effectively, it is also necessary that we be emotionally intelligent on an individual level. Knowledge about the emotions of oneself and also of others, and especially emotional regulation, are key for our relationships with others to be healthy and lasting. 

This book will give you all the knowledge you need to improve your relationships with other people.

5. Just listen! (Mark Goulston)

Active listening is one of the most important social skills, because it allows us to interpret not only the  verbal language of the person with whom we interact, but also their non-verbal language. Therefore, hearing is not the same as listening and communicating is not talking all the time. Communication also includes, for example, understanding the needs of others or validating them emotionally.

This fascinating book will let you know why active listening and empathy are so important, and are one of the secrets of great interlocutors.

  • You can buy it  here.

6. The Power of Introverts (Susan Cain)

Introversion and shyness are not the same, although some use these terms interchangeably. And although not everyone thinks it, introverts can also communicate effectively and have healthy interpersonal relationships. This work delves into this possibility, taking a tour of the most important aspects of the true potential of people with this personality trait. 

If you are an introvert, you can also be sociable and communicate better. You can see it with your own eyes through this work.

7. Crucial Conversations (Kerry Patterson)

Do you want to improve the way you communicate? Do you want to have interpersonal relationships with less conflict? So this book is the one you need. Because we all know that when we interact with other people difficulties can arise. Interpersonal relationships are not always easy. 

That is why, in this circumstance, it is necessary to possess key interpersonal skills to negotiate and to learn to overcome difficulties in the most appropriate way.

  • You can buy it  here.

8. Body Language (Allan Pease and Barbara Pease)

Non-verbal language represents almost 70% of the information that we transmit to our interlocutor when we make communicative contact with other people. That is why it is extremely important to be aware that non-verbal language is just as important as verbal language and, unfortunately, we often ignore it. 

This book reminds you of its importance and gives you the keys to improve this type of language.

  • You can buy it  here.

9. The myth of charisma (Olivia Fox Cabane)

People with charisma give off a magnetism towards other people and are very successful in their interpersonal relationships. Scientists have tried to figure out what characteristics these people have and why they are so valued by others.

In this book you will find theoretical and practical knowledge on this subject. This way you can improve your relationships with others.

10. Enrich your personality (Florence Littauer)

The author of this work is well known in the couples therapy circle and thanks to her experience she has been able to learn more about what happens when people interact with others with or without success. 

In addition, she is an expert in personality, and with this text she helps you improve the different facets of your life so that you can better relate to others.  

11. How to improve your social skills (Elia Roca Villanueva)

A comprehensive book to review the theory and practice of communication and social relationships.

12. Talk: how to talk to other people (Aston Sanderson)

One of the best known books to work on self-confidence, social skills and the ability to make yourself understood.

  • You have more information about this book  here.

13. Assertiveness (Olga Castanyer)

Assertiveness is a fundamental ingredient of social skills, and this is an excellent tool to promote it.

  • Read more about the book  here.

14. When I say NO I feel guilty (Manuel J. Smith)

Knowing how to defend your own point of view is often one of the most problematic aspects for shy people.

  • In  this link you have more information about this work.

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