The “porqueyolovalguismo”: The Philosophy Of The Narcissist Applied To Daily Life

People who display their moral superiority and claim the rights of others. So they are.

We have spoken several times about narcissism. This way of being close to the pathological refers to those people whose admiration for themselves is exaggerated.

Of course, this way of thinking also crystallizes in actions and attitudes that are palpable on a day-to-day basis. As the classic slogan of the L’Oreal shampoo brand said , they are individuals who move through life flaunting the maxim “because I’m worth it.” This is where the concept of “cosyolovalguismo” was born, which I will stop to explain in today’s article.

Opportunities and context

Let’s contextualize. Both in Spain and in most Latin American nations, we have suffered serious economic crises that have plunged us into a cultural situation where a job is almost a blessing. With an unemployment rate of more than 25% and almost 50% for young people in southern Europe, it is no wonder that their mindset about work has changed.

In the previous context, with a relative abundance of job opportunities, workers had the possibility of rejecting certain offers that did not meet certain requirements (salary, hours, distance) … Workers could not accept certain jobs that did not provide a stimulus ; after all, in a short time they could find something more according to their preferences and requirements. After the ravages of the crisis, the situation is no longer like that.

Unfortunately, and until there is a Universal Basic Income that guarantees the material subsistence of citizens, we have to continue working “whatever it takes” to be able to support ourselves. In a scenario of total scarcity of job opportunities, this mentality has almost completely disappeared: we are totally forced to accept any job offer, even if the remuneration or other characteristics of the offer are to our dislike.

The “cosyolovalguismo” in the culture of no-effort

Of course, that there is an urgent need to accept any job offer is very bad news for our society. It is a clear symptom that a country does not have sufficient development of the productive fabric to provide a variety of proposals and projects (work and life) to its citizens.

How do we react to this situation? Most people try to adapt to this new reality and, resigned, they assume that there is no choice but to go ahead and accept “whatever there is”. It is a mentality that runs the risk of falling into what the psychologist  Bertrand Regader describes as  ‘syndrome of the satisfied slave’, that is, into a neuroticism adapted to a directly unacceptable situation.

At the other extreme we find the “cosyolovalguismo”. Individuals who basically believe that they deserve all the best and who are not willing to accept that their employer does not pay them what they believe they deserve. They are individuals who have a very high concept of themselves, to the point of showing aggressive tendencies towards those who do not recognize and praise their supposed ‘qualities’; people who believe that this planet has been made available to them for their complete enjoyment and enjoyment, so that they can extract from it as many benefits as possible and, ideally, at a cost of personal effort equivalent to zero.

We are talking about a symptom not only present in the workplace, but generalized to practically all aspects of life in which the individual “because yolovalguista” can display his peculiar way of being.

The attitudes of the individual “Porqueyolovalgo”

We are not going to start looking for culprits or causes, because we do not consider that it is the function of this writing. However, it would not be unreasonable to point out that, in the globalized world where we live (in which concepts such as “privacy” or “intimacy” have been relegated to oblivion), social networks have influenced the time to accentuate the behavior of many people that already had a tendency to a high ego.

The possibility of publishing our experiences on platforms such as Facebook, Instagram or Twitter has caused a change in the needs of these people anxious for the approval of others: the search for “likes” or positive comments from friends on social networks in photos, comments or Personal opinions contribute to enhancing the ego and self-esteem of those who receive it, thereby reinforcing the possibility of repeating the action in the future, always with the mentality of achieving as much impact as possible.

The more attention received, the more reasons these people will have to assume that they should tell more about themselves and show as many ‘relevant’ aspects of their day-to-day life as possible, in an assumed fantasy that their ‘followers’ are eager to know what new there is in the life of the “Porqueyolovalgo”.

Protagonists of his own life … and that of others

In their mentality, in which they are the absolute protagonists and everything revolves around them, the “Porqueyolovalgo” legitimize their arrogance based on a false belief (but very real for them) that they should be thanked for having existed and for giving to others with their mere presence, as a new form of vassalage in the XXI century, in which we are expected to bow down and kiss the ground they tread and applaud all their behavior, no matter how reprehensible they may be.

As we say in Spain, these subjects are “delighted to meet each other”, which is the expression par excellence that catalogs and defines the attitude towards life of those who consider that their way of thinking, criteria, competence or talent is better than those of the rest .

By way of conclusion: rejecting moral superiority

Of course, this text is not intended to put in the spotlight those people who love themselves or consider that they can contribute to the society in which they are integrated. A distinction must be made between healthy self-esteem and bloated and exaggerated self-esteem.

What is reprehensible about individuals “because they are worthless” is their tendency to exhibit their moral superiority over other people. Free will cannot be justified blindly in a context of coexistence and sharing of common spaces and resources. As we said at the beginning of this writing, although many consider that they can freely dispose of the greatest number of benefits without making any contribution in this regard (we do not know if due to lack of sensitivity, maturity,  empathy or outright unconsciousness), the rest of us are not obliged nor should we allow that there are subjects that trample our rights or try to justify their privileges based on their arrogance.

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